Monday Musings: Graceful Is a Stretch, But I’m Still Dancing
Well, I wasn’t trying to hide my nose in this photo…it’s just the only one we managed to get yesterday during our walk that didn’t involve weird lighting, wind-blown hair, or me mid-blink… and right after a small rat scurried by (we’re all just trying to get by in the City). Sometimes you just go with the one that works.
And if you’re wondering what’s up with my nose, I mentioned it in yesterday’s email! A few of you even offered advice (and one sharp dermatologist weighed in) about the stubborn little spot that refuses to behave. I’ll be having it biopsied soon…not exactly my idea of fun, but better safe than sorry. If there’s one area where “wait and see” is a terrible strategy, it’s skin health. Consider this your friendly reminder to get that mole checked… and your excuse to treat yourself to a pumpkin spice latte afterward.
I also received many great style questions yesterday… thanks to everyone who joined in. I really enjoy the Sunday emails where we dig into your style questions, and it’s genuinely one of my favorite things to write. If you haven’t subscribed yet, I’d love for you to join us here. Just a quick note — the Sunday email only goes to readers subscribed to all new blog posts, not those on the Sunday-only list.
On a brighter note, ballet continues. I made it through almost the entire class this week, which felt like a small victory. My coupés were looking more on point (forgive the pun), and even though my foot and toe go intermittently numb, I loved every minute of it. I decided to take a seat when it was time for jetés…no need to tempt fate or risk a wobbly landing. Progress, not perfection.
Fall has me craving those warm, spicy scents that make a space feel calm and comforting, like the scent of cinnamon tea, crisp air, and a quiet evening in. My Brooklyn Candle Co. diffuser in the Itallia scent finally gave out after two solid years, and of course, I can’t find that exact scent again. So I’m ordering this candle version instead and hoping it brings the same soft, subtle warmth to the room.
Do you lean more towards a woodsy or amber-vanilla scent? I like something that feels cozy without veering into sugar cookie territory.
And finally, I stumbled upon a new book by Ellen Langer. Her work showed up at the exact moment I was feeling particularly old and mentally comparing how my body used to function with how it does now. (Spoiler: ballet brings these thoughts up more often than I’d like.)
She’s a Harvard psychologist often called the “mother of mindfulness,” but not in the yoga-mat-and-smoothie sense. Her research explores how our perspective on aging, health, and even time itself can directly influence our physical well-being. In one of her earlier studies, older men spent a week living as though it were 20 years earlier, surrounded by reminders of that era — and they actually showed measurable improvements in memory, flexibility, even eyesight.
Her more recent work looks at how the language we use around aging — even just in our own heads — can shape how our bodies respond. The idea that mindset affects biology isn’t new, but she makes it feel refreshingly practical.
It has me rethinking how I talk to myself — about balance, ballet, and getting older in general. Apparently, the brain is listening… even when I’d rather just mutter and reach for an ice pack.
How’s your self-talk holding up lately?
I had Basal cell carcinoma on my nose and had Mohs surgery in 2013.
The surgeon told me to put vitamin E on my nose and it healed very well with minimal scarring. Of course every time I get a pimple I am so worried it is cancer again, but so far, so good! I wish you well!
Your comment about self talk couldn’t have come at a more appropriate time. After 11 days of recovery from a simple laparoscopic surgery to remove a benign cyst, I continue to feel lousy and older than I am. Thanks for the book recommendation; I’ll check it out. And good wishes for your nose.
Hang in there Barbara. We are all here for each other
It is in the 40s and very grey and damp outside here today. Got out a sweater from storage to wear over my tee and jeans. Weather whiplash here in Colorado! I’m stretching more again but no ballet as my balance is a problem and I don’t want to fall. Fair fineboned petite women are prone to fracture with falls. We do still walk a mile a day with our dog Trixy.
My nose spot comes and goes and is tiny. The doctor doesn’t seem worried about it.
Just keep and eye on it. Coming and going has been a symptom of mine
I always look forward to all your blog posts. I find your honesty, your recommendations, and all the cool things you find are fun for me to also investigate.
So sorry to hear about the spot on your nose. I too had one that I felt was nothing more than a possible blackhead. As it turned out, it was a basal cell followed by Mohl surgery. Never let a spot go unattended again. Best of luck!
I just ordered your book recommendation. As someone who is turning 71 next month and tends to focus on my aches and pains more than I’d like to, I am anxious to read this book. The mind is a horrible thing to waste!
Thank you and keep us posted….always.
I will keep everyone posted. It’s so easy to focus on them, isn’t it?
In candles and room diffusers, I lean toward amber-vanilla, no woodsy for me…my poor hubby just can’t do that fragrance and he does have to live here too😅 Darn skin spots, I pray all goes well with that.
That’s funny Janette! I never ask what my husband likes because his sniffer doesn’t work that well anymore.
I enjoy A Well Styled Life for many reasons, most importantly is that it’s real and relatable. I’m sorry to hear about the spot on your nose. I had a basal cell spot on my nose and had to do Mohs surgery. It’s not a fun time, and yes, I see it each morning, but the alternative would be worse. Make up works wonders! I wish you well in the days ahead. You have great attitude, good doctors and a supportive family that will help you along the way. Thanks for sharing A Well Styled Life.
Thanks Mary! Thank goodness for coverup 😘
Hi Jennifer,
I LOVE your posts. I feel like you’re reading my mind!
Ok, I have a question for you. How do you get into a mindset to totally change styles. Everyone’s wearing wider leg jeans. I put them on and immediately I’m back in middle school thinking, “Everyone’s going to think I look awful in these”. Same for shoes. I LOVE shiny 🤩 shoes and I feel like I can totally rock them but there’s this little voice saying….”um, you’re 65, honey, not 25”. I have to confess that I JUST ordered silver flat loafers (vionic) so I’m gonna do it.
I just need to know how to talk yourself into just “doing it!”
Thanks,Jen! Have a great day!
Karen
It’s a mindset Karen. Realize that most people are too worried about how they look to think about how you look. AND, if you walk with confidence people will notice and think you look amazing.
Jennifer, your skill in “musings” is very “human and touching”. Makes us all relate to you. I do want to weigh on the skin cancers (I am 86, have had many many successful surgeries) and my dermatologist told me there is no substitute for removal, the “new non invasive choice” is not a choice.
Keep on keeping us informed on our health, and happiest. All the best!!!!
Thanks for sharing Diane, I tend to agree with you. I’ve had melanoma so I’m not willing to mess with this.
Italia Reed Diffuser Is on the BaskeHome website. Same price.
Yay!!! Thank you.
I occasionally listen to select Mel Robbins podcasts when walking the pup …and recently listened to Mel interview (episode October 24, 2024) Dr. Jim Doty, neurosurgeon/neuroscientist who shared how to reprogram your brain and manifest your dreams using simple neuroscience based tools. Also available on You Tube: https://youtu.be/s-wONyk3RV0?si=bQzZs40qkSfeHcKC Your self talk question is so relevant.
As I was looking for the episode information on the Doty interview, I read that Mel interviewed Dr. Ellen Langer on October 2, 2025…today’s listen!!! So thank you for sharing! Good luck with the biopsy. I had a similar lesion which thankfully was benign.
Dianne
This sounds great! I’ll look for the interview with Dr Doty. I just love this kind of stuff.
Good luck dealing with your nose.
Keep dancing!
It’s so great you are sticking with your ballet class. My husband and I do not talk about getting older. At 75 we decided to just step it up and walk more, play golf more and hired a strength trainer. Having a good mindset is everything.
That’s a fabulous mindset! I applaud you both.
I’m disappointed that the booties are sold out. I guess I didn’t act quickly enough.
Try Zappos! They’re on sale here too!
Thank you! I ordered them!
Glad you got them
I have listened to Langer on several podcasts and find her to be arrogant. Do you get that vibe from her book?
Not getting that vibe from the book. I’ve also listened to a few podcasts. I find her confident and with strong opinions. Not sure I would call it arrogant.
Thanks for the report s out the book, just requested it from my library. It’s also great to hear that you’re hanging out there with the ballet class. In August it was 10 years since I started barre classes, one of the best decisions ever. It incorporates ballet, yoga and Pilates moves and I’m a big fan, now gave my Jen barre at home to do my workouts on my schedule 3 times weekly.
Thanks for reminder. I would like to try barre again. I’ve only taken one class, about 15 years ago and I could not do it. I was just recovering from a cracked femur and torn labrum. The class was too early in my recovery and excruciating. Time to try again.
Do you have Swan candles in your area? They have wonderful fall scents plus lots of others. And they last a long time. Through the fall and winter we burn them every night. Makes Michigan nights cozier. Glad you are getting your nose biopsied.
I’ll see if I can find them online.
Thank you so much for the book recommendation. Healthy aging (physically, mentally, and spiritually) has become such a focus for me. There is so much that IS within our ability to control. What/how we eat, movement, relationships, and now this idea of how our minds impact our health-span.
Yes! I am focusing on it more and more too Linda
That study on aging and living in relics of the past really struck a chord with me. Made me sentimental thinking about my Dad surrounded by all of his things. Maybe some of us let go of things too easily…
I applaud you for getting back into dancing, that takes courage! Best of luck and healing prayers for your biopsy, praying that all goes well.
Thank you Lisa
Do you size up on the Eileen Fisher Stretch bootie? Reading the reviews, a few suggested to do so.
Yes! I wear a 9.5 but bought the 10 and find them the best fit for me.
Yes take care of that Jen and Ill follow suit with a newish mole on my leg ( shin) . Must call him this week! Biopsy time!
Good luck to us!
Please do! Good luck and let me know how it goes.